Benevolent heart

Laying in bed,
Counting sheep,
Wondering what I’ve done,
Third time this week,

Staying up till 4 am,
Listening to you breathe,
Over the phone,
I can’t fall asleep,

Am I stopping myself,
Am I stopping you,
Don’t wanna think about,
How much it would hurt to lose you,

Can’t stop thinking about it,
Cause I know my own flaws,
Driving a knife in my own heart,
I let you, let me, fall apart,

Laying in bed,
Struggling to count my fingers,
Vomit booze,
Putting myself through the wringer,

I wish I could hold you close,
But I burned this bridge down,
Wanna hold you close,
But I can’t back down,

I was right,
Only partially,
But for your happiness,
I’ll let myself bleed.

 

 

 

 

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